Navigating Low Milk Supply as a First Time Mom
I fulfilled my dream of having a home birth for my first pregnancy. But unfortunately, postpartum life was not as dreamy. I silently struggled with low milk supply for four months, trying everything possible to exclusively breastfeed my son. Despite my efforts, it never happened.
In this post, I’ll share my story of being a first-time mom with low milk supply. I’ll talk about how I got diagnosed with low milk supply, everything I did to increase my supply, the root cause of my low milk supply, and how I eventually surrendered and healed from the excruciatingly painful experience. If you’re interested in following along, read on.
My Beautiful Birth Experience Abruptly Comes To An End
The first couple of days after giving birth to my son were a dream. I was in pure bliss, spending every waking moment with the most precious thing I had ever seen. I was deeply in love with him and had him glued to my chest day and night, just like it was in the womb.
However, the following days became more and more challenging. He started to get very fussy all day, barely sleeping at night, and crying for hours on end until he eventually fell asleep from exhaustion. We tried everything, but couldn’t figure out why he was so inconsolable.
The Two Week Postpartum Visit
After two weeks, things were not getting better. Then my midwife and her assistant came to visit me at home for the two-week postpartum checkup. We all chatted for a while about how things were going those first two weeks. After about an hour of chatting, they started the routine checkup procedure.
A few minutes into their examination, my midwife’s assistant looked towards me and my husband and said, “He lost more than 20% of his birth weight. This is not good.”
Our hearts sank to the floor as we sat there in silence, not knowing how to respond.
They told us that he lost weight because he wasn’t getting enough milk, so I had to start supplementing with formula or donor breastmilk ASAP. I hated the idea of supplementing, but my midwife reassured me that it wasn’t a permanent solution. It was just something we had to do until I could get my supply back up.
Deep down, I couldn’t accept it. It felt like a compromise. Being told that I wasn’t making enough milk made me feel like a failure. I was embarrassed that my body couldn’t supply him enough milk. Meanwhile, my husband was deeply upset because he realized that our son was inconsolable for the past two weeks because he was very, very hungry. He ran to the local Whole Foods to get a good brand of formula that we could use ASAP.
I remember seeing him come home and open that can of formula for the first time, and tears started to come down my cheek. I wanted so badly to breastfeed him, but here we were giving him powder in a bottle. So many emotions were swirling around in my body and mind that I could barely think straight.
After processing what had just happened, a fire kindled inside me and I had a burning desire to get my supply up no matter what it takes. My goal was to get off supplementation as soon as possible. My midwife and her assistant came up with a plan for the next few weeks to help me get my supply up.
How We Tried To Fix Low Milk Supply
We came up with a multi-faceted plan to address my low milk supply. Let me walk you through the major parts.
1. Supplementation
First, we immediately began supplementing with formula. We started with a formula from WholeFoods called “Happy Baby” until our shipment of Holle, a formula made by a European company, arrived. We chose European formula companies because they use better ingredients. They avoid using seed oils or corn syrup and instead use high-quality ingredients like milk from pasture-raised cows.
2. Triple feeding
To increase my milk supply, we started “triple feeding”. This is a short-term strategy that some midwives use to boost milk production. It involved breastfeeding first, then supplementing with formula or donor milk, and finally pumping to stimulate milk production. I had to do all three steps every time I fed my baby. It was a time-consuming and exhausting process, but I was determined to make it work. So, I relentlessly triple-fed him.
3. Lactation consultant
My midwife referred me to a lactation consultant to improve my son’s latch. He was making a clicking noise every time he fed, which was a sign that he didn’t have the best latch. A proper latch is essential for stimulating the breasts enough to produce an adequate milk supply. Unfortunately, my first lactation consultant wasn’t a great fit, so I hired a second one who was much more helpful and supportive. She worked closely with me and my baby to get a better latch.
4. Chiropractor
My lactation consultant suggested that my son may have an anterior tongue tie. We then visited a local dentist to evaluate his mouth, but she didn’t see any signs of a tongue tie. Instead, she suggested that we see a chiropractor because my son was very tight on one side of his body, which could be causing issues with the latch. I remained hopeful about the chiropractic adjustments helping his latch. I spent countless hours driving to and from the chiropractor over the next 6 weeks.
5. Hospital-grade Pump
At first, I bought a standard pump from the market. However, when I found out that I had low milk supply, I knew I needed a hospital-grade pump to get the maximum stimulation possible and increase my supply. Renting a hospital-grade pump from Medela was the best option because buying one would have cost over $2,000. Fortunately, they shipped it right to my home.
6. Oatmeal
When I researched low milk supply, one of the top recommendations that came up was oatmeal. So, I decided to give it a try and started having a large bowl of oatmeal every day for breakfast.
7. Functional doctor
I wanted to figure out if any hormonal issues could be causing my low milk supply. So, I reached out to my functional doctor and we ran a bunch of labs to pinpoint any issues.
As you can see, I did everything in my power to increase my supply. I refused to give up until I either boosted my supply or identified the reason for the low production.
Low Milk Supply Took A Hit On My Relationships
I was struggling to accept that we had to supplement with formula. This eventually turned into me developing an unhealthy relationship with formula. I longed for the day when I could throw the box out and never have to buy it again.
My stubbornness and desperation to make breastfeeding work began to strain my personal relationships. I became obsessive about getting my son to breastfeed as much as possible and tracking how much formula he was getting each day. Meanwhile, my family couldn’t understand why I was being so obsessive and why they couldn’t just give him unlimited formula.
From my perspective, I noticed that the more formula he got, the less he would breastfeed because he was starting to prefer the bottle over the breast. But from their perspective, they wanted him to gain as much weight as possible. This created tension that built up over time, making what should have been a joyful newborn period into a stressful one.
This went on for the first four months postpartum until I eventually surrendered.
Surrendering To Low Milk Supply
When my son was about four months old, I finally had to accept the reality that my milk supply wasn’t going to increase. Despite my best efforts, I was only producing half the amount of milk he needed each day, and I was stuck there for weeks.
I had no choice but to accept this reality. I had to come to terms with the fact that not everyone can have a perfect breastfeeding experience, no matter how hard they try.
At least there was something to look forward to
At this point, my son was ready to start eating solids, which gave me something to look forward to. Even though I couldn’t give him my milk, I could still provide him with the most nutritious food on the planet and give him the nutrients he needed the natural way. And that’s exactly what I did.
I loved the journey of feeding him solids. It took my attention away from the constant stress of wanting to breastfeed and focused it on researching the best foods I could give him. I made everything myself from scratch and enjoyed watching him grow and gain weight from the food I prepared for him.
After about a month of starting solids, my milk supply began to drop even more. This happened around the time I took my son to India for the first time. Traveling long-distance wasn’t great for my supply because of the lack of sleep, change in diet, and inconsistent feeding schedule.
In addition to travel, I also started dancing and lifting more intensely again. This was probably another factor that affected my milk supply.
I continued to breastfeed him a couple of times a day, but by then, I had learned to be a lot less attached to it. Oddly enough, he started to latch better once I let go of my strong will to make it work no matter what.
Finally Weaned At 9 months
Over the next couple of months, my milk supply slowly dropped until it no longer made sense to keep trying to breastfeed my son. When he turned 9 months old, I stopped cold turkey. By then, he was eating two solid meals a day and doing great for his height and weight. His milk intake naturally decreased, and he was starting to prefer solids.
On one hand, stopping breastfeeding made me incredibly sad. On the other hand, it was liberating. The constant reminder of my low milk supply had taken a toll on me, and I needed to heal.
A Summary Of What Worked And What Didn’t Work
Let me tell you what worked and what didn’t work to increase my milk supply.
1. Triple feeding – No
It helped initially, but after a couple of weeks, it was pointless because my supply had reached its ceiling. Typically, a mom’s milk supply stabilizes around 6 weeks postpartum, so there was no point in triple feeding past this point. I still can’t believe I did it for four months.
2. Lactation consultant – No
Working with a lactation consultant proved to be both helpful and not helpful. The consultant provided me with great advice and was incredibly supportive. But I still struggled to get Shiva to stay on the breast for long. He would cry and cry, preferring the bottle because it was easier and faster. Countless times, I tried to breastfeed him, but he would cry the whole time, making it an unpleasant experience for both of us.
Eventually, I realized the real issue wasn’t that my son was having trouble latching. Instead, he was refusing to latch because he wasn’t getting enough milk from the breast.
3. Chiropractic care – No
Unfortunately, it didn’t do much to increase my milk supply, but it did help strengthen my pelvic floor. My chiropractor also worked on my pelvic floor and taught me how to engage my abs again after giving birth.
4. Hospital-grade Pump – Yes
Investing in a hospital-grade pump was definitely worth the cost and effort. It didn’t magically give me a full supply, but I truly believe it helped me produce the maximum amount my body was capable of. I noticed a significant difference in milk production between a regular pump and a hospital-grade one. Plus, it cut my pumping time in half, which was a huge relief given how draining it can be.
5. Oatmeal – No
I ate oatmeal every day, but I didn’t notice any improvement. Despite some moms swearing by it, I can’t say it helped me.
6. Functional doctor – Yes
Although we couldn’t identify a specific hormonal issue for my low milk supply (for example, my prolactin levels were good), we did discover that my T3 thyroid levels were lower than optimal. This meant that I needed to work on improving my T3 thyroid levels.
The Root Cause Of My Low Milk Supply
At the end of the day, I still don’t know for sure why I had low milk supply. All I have are theories. I can think of a few things that might have caused it, such as:
Insufficient glandular tissue
When a mother doesn’t have enough breast glandular tissue to produce sufficient milk, it’s called insufficient glandular tissue. I have a hypothesis that my breast development was stunted prematurely because of extreme dieting during my puberty years. You can read more about my experience here.
Intense exercise
I lead an active lifestyle. Bharatnatyam, for instance, demands a lot from me physically. It’s possible that the physical stress I experience from dancing and lifting weights was not balanced with my nutritional intake. Breastfeeding is an EXTREMELY energy-intensive process, and I may not have been consuming enough minerals and nutrients to fuel both my physical activity and breastfeeding.
Stress
Dealing with low milk supply was mentally exhausting. It’s possible that this stress contributed to a vicious cycle, where the stress of low supply decreased my milk production even further, leading to more stress, and so on.
Low thyroid
As I mentioned earlier, my functional doctor discovered that my T3 levels were on the low end. Although the levels didn’t warrant any medication, they weren’t at the optimal range either. Based on Ray Pete’s work, I understood that this could have contributed to my low milk supply.
Not eating enough carbs
I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was inadvertently eating a low carb diet, which I define as less than 100 grams a day. It wasn’t until I started tracking my macros at 6 months postpartum that I realized I was consuming a high-fat, lowish-carb diet. I learned that making milk requires a lot of energy, and carbs are the best source of energy for this. By asking my body to convert dietary fat into energy to make breastmilk, I may have only caused more stress on my body.
While I can’t say for certain why I had low milk supply, these are all theories that I’ve considered. What I do know, however, is that it was an incredible opportunity for me to heal and grow.
Healing From It All
I had no idea how much breastfeeding would matter to me until I became a mother. I felt a deep, inner longing that I didn’t even know existed until my son was born.
Not being able to breastfeed as I wanted to was excruciatingly painful, but I eventually accepted that breastfeeding didn’t define me as a mother. Having low supply didn’t mean I was a failure.
Moreover, I tried my BEST and gave it my all. I was proud of myself for not giving up too soon. Rather than feeling embarrassed for having low supply, I learned to love my body for creating a beautiful baby from scratch. There was so much good to focus on, and I learned to stop zooming in on the one unpleasant thing and letting it define my relationship with my newborn son and my confidence as a mother.
I no longer feel the same level of attachment to getting everything perfect for my future children. If breastfeeding works out, great. If it doesn’t, then it isn’t the end of the world.
I will try my best to make it work, but I won’t be afraid or reluctant to supplement if that is the right answer. I now know that I can still be the best mother, regardless of whether I am able to breastfeed my children or not.
